BE FOREWARNED HOMEBIRTH AHEAD.:) NO worries though, NO revealing pix, and NO really graphic details.:)
Ok, so I have a super huge fear of sounding totally lame when I write a story so I have procrastinated writing down my homebirth experience for others to read. But I have been asked enough times to write it down that I am just going to bite the bullet and do my best. :)
Here goes:
Lots of people have asked me to tell them about my homebirth experience and I kind of never know how to respond to that. What specifically do they want to know? So if I don't answer everyone's questions please email me. :)
So when I was pregnant with Jane, BJ and I decided to change our care provider at 36 weeks because we felt really, REALLY unsupported by our OB regarding natural birth. For those of you who don't live in Nevada, Nevada is really anti-natural birth, the c-section rate is phenomonily high and so is the episiotomy rate. So we found April Kermani CNM(Certified Nurse Midwife) who is AMAZING! We always tell her we are her biggest fans. :) At the time she was delivering babies in the hospital working under an OB, meaning she delivered the babies, but if there was an emergency the OB would step in. During labor in the hospital I was supported by my midwife for natural birth but aside from that I hated the hospital. I had one really wonderful nurse, but there were many things that bothered me about unnescesary hospital protocol, like giving my baby a hearing test at 2AM because it was the scheduled time after Jane was born. For real, that could wait until the next day. Anyway, when I got pregnant with Denny I felt like even though I hated the hospital, homebirth at the time felt really extreme so I planned another hospital birth with April....
Then we found out that April was no longer doing hospital births and was only doing home births, or births at a birthing home in Las Vegas. At first home birth felt so extreme that we decided to use the OB April previously had worked under, but after the first two visits I really didn't like the way things were going, same as before, hospital birth with not a lot of support in the natural field. So I decided maybe I could do a birthing-home birth with April. So we went to check out the birthing home, but it was on the other side of town. I realized that, if there was a complication, the hospital that I liked was WAY closer to my house than this birthing home, and really there weren't many differences between birthing at the birthing home and birthing at HOME. So I prayed MILLIONS and felt REALLY, REALLY good about homebirth. Every birth experience is so different and I very much encourage Mums to pray about how and where they should birth. It is a very individual choice.:)
So my pregnancy went wonderfully. Having a midwife instead of an OB was marvelous, I was much more in control and informed about my choices about EVERYTHING: tests I wanted or didn't want; what the risks were with a multitude of things; I didn't have internal exams all the time (near my due date I didn't have one until I was 40 weeks, and that was just 'cause I was curious). We decided to hire a doula, which is a labor coach, which was an AMAZING idea, not only because of how it affected my labor experience, but also because through Sherry (my doula :) ). I met a ton of new friends who were very educated about natural birth and cloth diapers and millions of other things. :) BJ and I also took a birthing class again (with Jane we took Hypnobirthing). This time it was a 6 week course our doula gave, covering everything from conception to post partum. We got super informed about what labor really is and isn't. I totally believe that birth is a natural process and can be an absolute life-changing experience.
So here comes the labor part... :)
So everyone thought I was going to go early. I had only gained about 15 pounds total and I was super, super healthy and had a TON of early labor. I had taken some herbal supplements that I had been recommended and had researched, and I know they helped my body get prepared for labor. So 40 weeks came, 41 weeks came and still no Aiden. Two days before I turned 42 weeks I saw April and she checked me, I was 3cm dilated and about 80% effaced. She did some cervical massage to try and get things going. This was Tuesday July 29th at around 5pm, I think. At around 6pm I start noticing the cramps, but I had had so much early labor I was wary to think this was it. Around 7pm I started to count the contractions, and even though they were already just three minutes apart I was still wary (with Jane I had early labor where my contractions were a minute apart and it wasn't actual labor... oy). At 8 they were counting at a minute apart. Around 9 I call my sister and tell her they are a minute apart, but I don't think I should call Sherry yet because it was probably just early labor, but the contractions WERE getting stronger so maybe I should call her. She said, uh YEAH! So I call Sherry, but tell her I want to wait a bit longer to make sure they aren't going to stop. Around 10pm I call Sherry and she gets to my house around 10:30. She is certified as a monatrice which means she can do an internal exam and check to see how I am progressing. I am still at a 3cm and 80% effaced, but the baby is REALLY low. Jane was asleep by then in her room so me and Sherry and BJ sat in the living room and chatted in between contractions. At this point I was still able to easily breathe through the contractions. Around midnight, I think, Sherry filled up the birthing tub and I got in. It felt REALLY good. The hot water made the contractions seem less strong, and made me way more comfortable. As the night progressed the contractions continued to get stronger. BJ got in the tub for a bit and held me through the contractions. The thing about birthing tubs is that their magic wears off after awhile because your body gets used to it, so after awhile I decided to get out and labor while walking around, on the floor, whatever felt comfortable.
It was wonderful having Sherry there because it took the pressure off of me and BJ to know what to do. It allowed me to focus because I knew Sherry would help me if I needed anything and, in some magic way, because of that I relaxed and somehow my body did know what to do on its own. It is hard to explain. And it made it so BJ became my super support. He walked the halls with me as I leaned on him. He got me water when I needed it. We became super focused together, it was an incredibly bonding experience, something that we didn't feel at the hospital with me tied down to the bed with monitors and iv's and so forth. I was in charge and it felt great!
About 2:30, I think, April came and so did her wonderful assistant, Kim. I continued to labor, it was getting a bit harder because I was getting tired from the continued deep focusing through the ever stronger contractions and because of the very late hour. I hopped in the very hot shower a few times and that felt AMAZING. SOOOO GOOD.:)
Around 3:30 April checked me again and I was only at a 5, and I think almost 100% effaced. No one could believe it. From these very experienced women, they all thought I was in transition because I was showing all the signs and I wanted to push. When I heard I was only at a 5 I got really discouraged. I tried not to because I knew that didn't mean a lot, timewise. I was just really, really tired. Little did I know that in an hour I would progress to a 10 and at 4:30am my water broke as I was pushing, and at 4:45 am my little prince, Aiden Matthew Hamaker was born. I labored on the floor because I couldn't picture me laboring on the bed or in the birthing tub for the actual birth. I wanted to birth on the birthing stool but my toosh was too small. :) So I ended up on the floor of my living room leaning back against BJ. (Don't eek out, people! My carpet was covered with a shower curtain, etc.) Denny came out in pretty much just a few pushes. One of the nice things about going natural is that by the time it is time to push it feels REALLY good to push. Denny came out and I guess since it had been an intense experience for him too, he came out and fell right asleep. April gave him a little oxygen because he was so quiet, and he was just fine. No spanking my baby to make him cry, no roughing him up, no taking him away right away to measure him or poke him or whatever. I held him until my placenta was delivered and then I was ready for a shower! Please don't think I am a horrible mother for "deserting" my baby so soon after birth, but I knew I would enjoy him so much better if I was clean. :)
As tired as I had been right before he came, I was SUPER awake after he came. My shower was so lovely and then I came into the bedroom, BJ was almost asleep, April and Kim were checking Denny out, measuring him and weighing him (Sherry went home around now). He didn't get any shots just then (actually he hasn't had any shots still, not till next week when he turns 2 months). He didn't have any jaundice. After he nursed for a bit, April and Kim tucked us into bed and left. It was WONDERFUL! No nurses checking our blood pressure every thirty minutes. No husband sleeping so far away on a couch. I had just gone through a super intense bonding experience with my eternal companion, I wanted him with ME. :) Denny fell asleep in his co-sleeper and we all took a well needed rest.
My favorite things about homebirth were mostly right after the birth. I loved being in charge during the birth (as much as was safe, of course). I could eat what I wanted, drink what I wanted. I could move where ever I wanted. After the birth there was no fighting with nurses about hearing tests at 2am, no waiting until I could check out to go home, I WAS home. :) It was so peaceful afterwards. I loved it.
April is a super qualified midwife with both hospital experience (she even worked at a hospital with a NICU) and home birth experience. She knows the difference between an emergency and a safe birth experience. We trust her millions. Homebirth is a wonderful experience for a million reasons, but it is not for everyone. I recommend continually learning more and more about your options when you are pregnant and look to many resources.
Hope this satifies everyone's curiousity. Sorry I am not a very good written-on-paper story teller. I am a more of a tell-you-in-person type storyteller. Email me if you have any more questions!
Love!
This Happy Homebirthin' Mumma:)
PS. I wasn't going to add this, but thought maybe I should. I think the biggest blessing for me with this birth, and why I think Heavenly Father was such a fan of this idea for me personally, were the things I learned about myself during homebirth. I have been struggling with poor health for the last three years, and kind of gotten to a point where BJ does pretty much everything. I am tired all the time and it is hard for me to get anything done during the day. I knew BJ was going to be starting school again right after Denny was born and I would have to start doing A LOT more. I was really nervous about it, REALLY stressed that I wouldn't have the energy and be well enough to do it. It is really frustrating and demoralizing to not have the energy or ability to fullfill your responsibilities and to take care of your family like you want to. I felt very weak. During my pregnancy with Denny there were many times where I said " I could NEVER do ..." Homebirth, cloth diapers, etc. In every case at some point Heavenly Father made me feel good about it and I would change my mind and find that I COULD do whatever it was. After the labor in particular I had an amazing self realization. I was strong where I had thought I was weak. I had just done something that millions of women think is impossible. It was hard at times, but it was very doable, and I DID IT. I think Heavenly Father knew that I personally needed to know I am strong, and can do anything TRULY with the Lord's help and support. Not every woman needs that knowledge, or needs homebirth to realize that, but for me it was a revelation and something I haven't felt for a long time. :) Just thought I would add that. :)
